After coming up with this title, I could not get the Thin Lizzy track of the same name out of my head. I started running the lyrics and I have “don’t believe me if I tell you, especially if I tell you, I’m in love with you” I then thought I possibly have those lyrics wrong? Was that track a single? What was the full name of the guitarist with Surname Robinson that replaced Gary Moore? Or did they play together? But there was another pretty boy American guitarist called Scott something. Is he still alive? I know Moore and Lynott are not, and I suspect Whoever Robinson isn’t. What album was that track on? What year was it released? (To save you looking up: it was from the album ‘Johny the Fox’. it was indeed a single and there is so much on Wiki about the band members. Most scarily, it is nearly 50 years ago old: Being produced in 1976!
Lots of trivial questions, and all can be answered with a quick search on the internet. And that is the basis of this article: We all use www for answering most of our questions, and those answers are not always correct. Certainly, in 1976, we could not have gleaned the answers to those questions from a computer. So, information retrieval has “progressed” in a very short time.
But to show how unreliable the www can be: I have been busy this week changing oils, filters and rear brake pads on my two cars. Our VW had a squeal that started when applying the brakes. Our Volvo had a squeal which stopped when applying the brakes! It turns out, the rear brake pads was not the cause of the squeal on the Volvo, but they needed doing anyway.
Delivery companies are so impressive on communication. This is certainly not next day Prime, and I already regret not collecting in person from my local Euro Car Parts. As the box says for Ford S Max I will find out soon if they are compatible for my Volvo. That could had been a question I could have asked at the counter. Learn from my bad calls.
Those routine maintenance jobs were quite simple to do, but I was helped by a quick search on YouTube that identified how to retract the piston callipers on both cars. Both have electric parking brakes. NB. I had to buy a tool for the VW, a universal type, which was once again covered on YouTube, where they showed four different methods of retracting them. The Volvo had to have the park brake electric motors removed (one screw had to be drilled off FFS, and then the piston turned fully lockwise via the torx drive, then pushed back using a G clamp. All very easy, to do, but I would not have known any of that if ‘Volvosweden’ on YT had not shown me. I guess a Haynes manual would have covered it, but I do not possess any. Uptick for the tinternet.
Now for the down ticks: Volume of engine oil to order for the VW. I already knew the volume for the Volvo, it is in the handbook (5.9L) so a little spare after ordering 6L (Amazon of course). The VW was an unknown, although I had changed the oil two years ago (only 5,000 miles/year) As the handbook did not state the volume, I went the internet route and determined it was 4.6L. So I ordered 5L. And this is where Amazon is most impressive, you get options of different volumes. Not just 1L or 5L, but all those in between (apart from 3L!) I could had got away with a 4L container. As luck would have it, I dipped the oil after putting in approx. 3.8L and it was already showing a level on the dipstick, thinking that will not take another 0.8L, I did some more online research regards volume, and found another site that confirmed the volume to be only 4.0L
Confession: The only reason I dipped the oil early, was because I had an awful thought that I possibly had not refitted the sump plug and that oil was already filling up the top of the under-engine cover. A mate did exactly that and only realised when his feet got wet!
As anyone with a hint of mechanical sympathy knows over filling an engine with oil is detrimental and a real ball ache in removing the excess.
Another YouTube clip was required to show me where the oil filter was located. Even though I replaced it two years ago, all I could recall was that it was in an unusual location. I went looking for guidance: The American YouTuber identified it as being in a dumb place. So, a second visit under the car with a torch located it. I worked solo, but my wife interjected part way through and asked whether I was working with a Mr Dickhead, as I kept shouting out his Surname.
I need to share this statement from the VW Handbook section on lubricating oils, which stated a specification. It was only on entering that spec into an internet search that it came back with the oil viscosity, but nowt on volume. But this statement made me laugh:
‘Engine oil must be kept in the closed original containers. This also applies to used engine oil until it is disposed of. Never use empty food containers, bottles or other containers to store engine oil as other people may then drink the engine oil.’
Sensible stuff, but where is the bloody volume confirmation?
Another example of misinformation from the internet was regarding the Volvo wheel bolt torques. I initially came up with this gem:
https://tireswheels.org/mastering-volvo-xc70-wheel-nut-torque
Recommended Wheel Nut Torque for Volvo XC70
Here are the recommended torque settings for the wheel nuts of your Volvo XC70:
WHEEL SIZE TORQUE (LB-FT) TORQUE (NM)
15-inch 81-94 110-128
16-inch 81-94 110-128
17-inch 81-94 110-128
18-inch 81-94 110-128
I should had suspected 77th Brigade interference because they described the details as ‘wheel nut torques’ They are bolts, you university educated dimwits.
It does not matter what the wheel size is, the bolt size determines the torque. Which is rather obvious from the list. Plus, I have never known an XC70 use 15 or 16-inch wheels, but one never knows. Those wheel sizes would be great with deep sidewall tyres to deal with UK potholes.
I do question the range of torque of 110-128 Nm. Nonsense: there should only be one figure. And the handbook states 140 Nm.
Beware: it is very important that you tighten nuts (or bolts) to the correct torques. And when I removed the wheels. I felt they were not very tight. The worrying thing is I am the one who did not check the torque 50 miles after new tyres were fitted in 2022. Again, learn from my mistake.
I appreciate this article has been a rather male orientated topic, so here’s one for the ladies.
That’s the light-hearted stuff out of the way. The real issue for me on the internet is determining whether the ‘truth tellers’ that I follow are being truthful. Previous articles of mine give names of the people I follow. Sometimes I question their view of events. Plus, I read all the comments BTL in FSB (it’s my job) and often most in The Spectator magazine. Often opinions are poles apart.
Part 2 will be a look at how these polarized opinions have become on such divisive subjects as Covid or Convid, proxy war or unjustified invasion, genocide or freeing hostages, Hamas supporters or peace protestors. Starmer: total twat or just a dick head. Etc.
That article could be a bit deep for me, so perhaps I will not write it: “don’t believe a word. No don’t believe a word. Don’t believe me, don’t believe me. Please consider writing a comment to this brilliant article, I would like to get it above one hundred comments, and also to this other brilliant one:
https://www.freespeechbacklash.com/article/bloody-irritating-modern-advertisements