We hold it self-evident that the bedrock of a stable, civil society is the family. And we hold it equally self-evident that the presence of responsible, dedicated parents is the foundation of the family. And by parents we mean the traditional, age-old arrangement of a married mother and father. And we also think it obvious that by far the best arrangement for raising well-balanced, happy children is for them to have their mother at home, full time, preferably until they are aged about 11 and starting secondary education.
Now some will object, saying that married parents and stay at home mothers are no guarantee of a happy family, and that there are plenty of examples of such relationships resulting in dysfunctional families. Or will rightly point out that some single mothers successfully raise children to be good adults and that some single sex couples make superb parent. And of course this is right, but that does not alter the fact that in general, the traditional family is the most successful child rearing unit of society.
In all human societies the family is the primary social unit, older and more influential than that of religion or state. Children are born and nurtured in a family, most go on to create their own families and family members interact with each other generating bonds to the common culture. The family is the primary unit for economic survival, child rearing, education and cultural identification. And it is for this reason that totalitarian organisations and the enemies of traditional society always target the family and seek to undermine it.
Today, the family is under attack from all directions. Sociologists and socialists portray it as oppressive, sexist, even racist. The State undermines it through the welfare state, taxation, the attempted nationalisation of children and the flow of laws that undermine parental authority. And, last but not least, by making divorce easy despite an avalanche of research demonstrating the traumatic impact divorce has on children and that children living with their married, biological parents consistently have better physical, emotional, and academic well-being.
Most of us instinctively feel that a mother staying at home to look after her children is enriching her children’s lives and giving them the best start in life. This is supported by much independent research. A 2014 study found that the benefits of having a parent at home extend beyond the early years of a child's life. It measured the educational performance of 68,000 children and found an increase in school performance over all ages.
Other studies indicate decreased stress and aggression in the children of stay-at-home mothers and suggest that a mother being at home with her children offers benefits to their development compared with them being in being in childcare full-time. While these are not absolutes, and many children do well enough with working mothers, and obviously many mothers have to work to help the family pay its way, we take is a fact that for children mother being at home for them is the ideal.
But what of the women? Of course, many love being full-time mothers and housewives. But many don’t and feel it diminishes them in many ways. Yet they still do it for the sake of their children. It’s high time that their sacrifice is recognised and rewarded. Even women who love staying at home make sacrifices, not least in terms of pension rights. As they do not earn and pay national insurance taxes, they are likely to receive only very small state pensions.
Many intelligent mothers lack stimulation and, as the media lauds high flying career women, feel undervalued and humiliated. They may also be more likely to lose self-esteem and experience worse physical and mental health than those who work and can feel isolated and lonely. Some say that they feel a loss of personal identity.
And most work very hard, cooking, cleaning and entertaining the children, exhausting stuff that is never-ending and very much taken for granted. The sacrifices made by such women have a hugely beneficial affect on society and we should all be proud of them and give them all the support we can. They are deserving of our respect and admiration at least as much as women with successful careers, and we should let them know that very chance we get.