Alternative Christmas Cards

By Graham Bedford on

ccw
Image by Alpha India

Inspired by a comment by our Editor made, that he is annoyed that friends that he and YZZ had agreed with not to exchange Christmas cards.  Had then gone and sent them one. This situation, I now believe will lead to what I call the ‘alternate Christmas card’ program

But first, let’s start with a pressing question: Why do people send cards at all?  For that, we can blame the Victorians

Another: Why do some replace “Christmas” with “Xmas” when they write on those cards?

Yet another: why do some people write pretty much the same comment that is printed above in those cards.  Whereas others just write a “To x and x” Others give a brief appraisal of what they had been up to since their last card.  Which is impressive, unless they have poor handwriting.

Friends come and go in life, and it is difficult to define who are genuine friends.  Some are old school mates, some work colleagues, that become ex colleagues that you remain friendly with.  But where is that dividing line?

I do recall when I was single and thus doing all the donkey work in sending out the annual cards. I would consider whether I should send one to so and so. In cases where I did send them one, but didn’t get one from them, often the next year, as I had not received one back, I did not send one, but then received one!

So, I then sent one the following year, but I did not receive one, and so on it goes.

This year my wife has volunteered to write and send all the cards, as I think she feels sorry for me having just paid £2.80 per card to send to her friends and family in Latvia.  Those stamps were applied by the Post Office staff on 12/12, with the comment that there was no guarantee of receipt before Christmas. Twelve days to get there! We will see if they get delivered at all, as her mum never did receive the card sent last year. We really have gone backwards in the card delivery department compared to parcels.

As Fagin sings in Oliver, we may need to “review the situation” What a strange custom we have all been drawn into with the sending of these things.

On one card we received this year from some friends, they had taken the trouble of ‘Googling’ Merry Christmas in Latvian and written it on the back of the envelope and my wife is still laughing at my attempts to read it out loud: Priecīgus Ziemassvētkus

One card I received from an ex-colleague, who stated in the card that he has now retired, and that he had been campaigning for Labour.  I am amazed that I should know anyone that would admit to that.  Anyway, he always was your typical champagne socialist.  

He included with his card, a brief (witty?) note from Donald J Trump, and I copy it here:

lsr

In response, there was this note from The Labour campaigner’s commander in chief:

“Dear comrade

May I take this opportunity to thank you for your efforts in campaigning for Labour.  “We did it!” That is, we have successfully grifted the British public in their believe that in getting a new government, things would change.  We are of course the red cheek of the Uniparty’s fat arse.     The blue cheek is currently resting before going again.

You may have been one of the fortunate 100 Labour party members that we sent to the USA to support Kamala, and of course we were sadly thwarted in trying to steal the election again. Rest assured all is not lost, we have plenty of members of congress in the pay of the Military Industrial Complex and certainly more kickbacks will continue to provide our future incomes. 

Kamala will be replaced by another DEI hire, likely from the LBGTFC community, so things are looking rosy on that side of the pond. The Donald has his work cut out trying to return the ten million plus illegals we have successfully allowed into that once great country.  Large numbers of these are armed gang members, so we can look forward to the sight of law enforcement lives being lost in trying to gather up these people.

We are taking steps to ensure RFK Jr goes the way of his father and uncle.  We most certainly do not want to Make America Healthy Again, as there is far too much money to be made in keeping Americans obese and ill.  We are currently analysing whether the magic bullet can be reutilised! How prophetic would that be? Our very own Dr Fauci will ensure that those heart disease, cancer and blood clotting shots continue to get injected into every arm he can, indeed if it were not for the failing fertility rates, that was so successfully achieved, Anthony would be working on injections for foetuses! That guy is a laugh a minute, especially when he doubles up on his masks, and can hardly breathe…what a guy! 

Closer to home, our efforts to barrack large numbers of foreign men of fighting age gathers apace.  All of course amusingly paid for by the UK taxpayer, we will endeavour to increase those numbers, whilst also talking about “breaking the gangs” and obviously doing absolutely nothing.   

As a Marxist, I should not be wishing you a merry Christmas, but as I have no principles or convictions, and have the popularity of a wet fart on a dancefloor: Merry Christmas brother.

I am currently travelling the world in my new paid-for-by-Alli suits and with my new glasses that have no corrective lenses but do make me appear so much more statesman like.  I am on a mission to rack up a million miles of air travel before the New Year, whilst flying my entourage out to promote Net Zero.  I tell you brother; you could not make this shit up; it is so lucrative.

The CCS scam that will make a few people very rich, whilst we continue to erect windmills and solar farms utilising Chinese products produced using coal fired power.  Ed will ignore global emissions.  And for those pensioners deprived of winter fuel allowance, I suggest they burn books to keep themselves warm.

I am coping with the vitriol, but I do sometimes wish I was a train driver; unbelievably those guys get paid double what an airline pilot does!  They will not be voting for any other party anytime soon. In fact, my aim is that no one in the public sector would vote for anyone other than Labour. Our Civil Servants will ensure I remain in post.

As a card-carrying Labour supporter your name will be entered into a prize draw, and you could be the lucky person that accompanies my wife, Alli cat (as I like to call him) and myself to see Taylor Swift next time she tours. All costs of course will be reimbursed by the Labour Party.

Regards your leader

Insincere, two tier, free gear, never here, probably queer, farmer harmer 

PS. Did you see that note from DJT? So full of inaccuracies.  He describes Biden as a LOOSER: 

Looser: not firmly or tightly fixed in place; detached or able to be detached. So, I guess that was inadvertently the correct description, but I would have gone with loser.

It also states that he was the 46th President! how droll…. He obviously should had been, but 45th and 47th will have to do. Ho, ho, ho”

Back to GOG: wishing all my readers (both of you) a Priecīgus Ziemassvētkus